But You see the confusion, sadness, thankfulness, resentment, frustration, hopefulness, hopelessness, joy...
I thought about life tonight. The waves crashed in front of me as I looked into the darkness...my arms resting on the rail of the balcony. A tear nearly formed in my eye and would have fallen to the ground 16 floors below. Of course, it did not help matters that I had just watched the ending of two sad movies: "The Notebook" and "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button".
This life is but a vapor (James 4:14). It "appears for a little time and then vanishes away". And what do I (one out of billions of people) expect to accomplish? I go about my day to day but to what end? Eternity. Yes, forever with Jesus. But what about what I leave behind? Should there even be a "but"? It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man (Psalm 118:8). Who cares about what the human race thinks, right?
Tonight I care. Yet, who will even remember me when I am gone from this earth? Maybe a few hundred people...for a little while. Just briefly, then time marches onward.
Ick, pride! Is that you? Be gone!
My pajama pants are warm as I pull them from the dryer. I can still hear the surf against the shore through the screen door. Thank You, God, for Your creation!
In the afternoon sun I had watched a fish jump from beneath the water's surface. It flicked it's body seemingly with glee. Joyfully it launched itself as dolphins meandered parallel to the coastline.
For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. (Romans 1:20 ESV)
Your Will be Done
Your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven. (Matthew 6:10 ESV)
Sovereign God, creator of all things, my trust is in You, Lord. You are my refuge and strength. You keep my going out and coming in (Psalm 121:8). I do not lean on my own understanding (Proverbs 3:5). When you open a door, I run through it. When you close a door, I try to accept it gracefully. If something is unknown, I must be still and wait on You, my King. Your Holy Spirit relays to You the desires of my heart. I am Your humble servant, stand before Your throne of grace, and anticipate (with unbending faith) Your instruction.