19Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. (Colossians 3:19. ESV.)Why does God’s word have to tell husbands to “not be harsh” with their wife? Allow me to show you the rest of that scripture for a minute:
20Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 21Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. 22Bondservants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. (Colossians 3:20-22. ESV.)Do your children obey you? Is it most of the time or part of the time? Do slaves take joy in serving their “master”? Do you see where I am going with this? Why is it necessary for scripture to tell husbands to “not be harsh” with their wife? Perhaps because there are husbands who are.
A husband is the head of his household just as Jesus is head of the body of Christ (the church). To me, the saying above, “Happy wife, happy life,” would be like saying, “A happy church, a happy Jesus.”
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30because we are members of his body.31“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”32This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. (Ephesians 5:25-33. ESV.)Can you not see the romance and beauty in that?! For a husband to be so in love with his wife that he gives himself up for her? “As Christ loved the church”… those words are HUGE!!! Look at what Christ Jesus did for the church! I think some get caught up on the “wives submit to your husband” part but really when you love someone, do you not do that anyway? Who in love does not feel compelled to spend every waking moment thinking about and spending time with the other person? What about taking that person out to dinner or buying him/her something? “He who nourishes and cherishes [his wife like his own body], just as Christ does the church” A husband who loves his wife like his own body. Is that not beautiful? And the wife respects her husband.
If a husband loves his wife like he loves his own body and is not harsh with her, I do believe it would be quite easy for a wife to respect her man and not mind giving into him…giving him her all…doing everything for him. (And vice versa.) So, no more of this “a happy wife makes a happy life” bunk! "He who loves his wife loves himself," how's that for a catch phrase?
The defense rests, your honor.