Monday, April 13, 2015

Thoughts pack my brain as I sit here to write, this morning. I had an eventful weekend which has me visiting and revisiting it in my mind. Conversations unfold as I look over each thing I recall speaking as I assess and evaluate myself. What did I do well? Where were my challenges? What could I have done differently? Did I glorify God or dishonor Him?

Sunday was especially discouraging for me. I thought I was doing a pretty good job, this past week, in the ministry in which I serve. I felt more confident than ever before…but after getting some feedback, it seems, perhaps I was not doing as well as I had perceived. Which leaves me pondering, if I feel I was performing up to par and really I was not and I could not tell the difference then perhaps I am really not cut out for that particular ministry. Or, maybe we just need more time together to get things fully ironed out. I do not know.

Yet God in His infinite wisdom and being able to see my thoughts and my heart, has redirected me to what is TRULY important, and on what my thinking and prayers should be, constantly.

As I was doing my university work and researching someone about which I had read, I found myself seeking John Piper’s input, as I generally do when I am confused about something faith based. On his site I came across a gem for me, today. It is “When Women Face Their Curse-Ravaged Homes”.
15 Yet she will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith and love and holiness, with self-control. (1 Timothy 2:15)
Then suddenly, nothing else --- none of the swirling contemplation of the weekend, etc. --- seemed to matter.

Kim Ransleben wrote,
Our children are our first students, and the constancy of their need is our pervasive teacher. Their cries and wants bring to life the battle of dying to ourselves that another might live. As our children grow up, so do their mothers….

Not only does it sometimes feel like we are being pushed to the “lesser” work, with no voice in the church (much less the world), but being faithful mothers means that we must turn toward the area of our lives that is often the hardest for us to face. Come to find out, we’re right about how painful it is. The curse of Genesis 3 is felt not only in the breadth of the pain in childbearing, but in the depth of the risk known as mothering. From prolonged singleness to struggling marriages, infertility to unplanned pregnancy, the death of a child to the waywardness of our young adult children, women face one grief after the other….

When I read of the women who came before me, I learn that if I serve like Martha, kneel like Mary, acquiesce like our Lord’s mother, serve like Phoebe, and teach like Priscilla, then I can know that forever men will be taught by my life. I don’t need to take on their roles to be effective in Christ’s church.
(By Kim Ransleben. ©2015 Desiring God Foundation. Website: desiringGod.org. http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/when-women-face-their-curse-ravaged-homes

The events of this weekend are fading away. The days are gone and I have children to teach about Jesus in the day to day.

16 To the woman he said,
“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.
Your desire shall be for your husband,
and he shall rule over you.”

17 And to Adam he said,
“Because you have listened to the voice of your wife
and have eaten of the tree
of which I commanded you,
‘You shall not eat of it,’
cursed is the ground because of you;
in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life;
18 thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you;
and you shall eat the plants of the field.
19 By the sweat of your face
you shall eat bread,
till you return to the ground,
for out of it you were taken;
for you are dust,
and to dust you shall return.”
(Genesis 3:16-19. ESV.)
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